Like most, our summer was filled with tons of pool days. At least 5 a week for about 8 weeks to be exact.
These were no ordinary days in the sun however. This summer we had our little guy enrolled in Infant Swimming Resource (ISR) lessons. I was unfamiliar with the program until a social media connection posted a video of her same-aged son swimming on his own with the caption “Pretty good for a week and a half of lessons!” My interest was piqued and our journey started the same day.
As a mom who struggles with anxiety and worry, I’ve learned the best way to combat fear is with action. We live in Charleston (surrounded by water) and love to be outside. Our son is going to grow up around the water and needs to know how to enjoy those activities safely. I didn’t even discuss it with my husband first – as soon as I found an instructor with openings, I paid the registration fee to get the ball rolling.
To say I was excited is an understatement. We got new swimsuits, started talking about swim lessons, ensured he would have so much fun and I began dreaming of the smiles and quick accomplishments.
And then we had our first lesson… And I learned that my big lunged child was capable of even higher decibels than I ever knew.
At first the crying didn’t bother me. It was a new experience and a different type of swimming than he was used to, so some hesitation was to be expected. I knew what we were doing was for his good and he would get over it.
But after awhile, it started wearing on me.
Every day for two weeks straight, the tears and resistance started as soon as we got in the car to drive to the pool. I had to carry him kicking and screaming up the walkway as I joked “just making our presence known!”
He clung to me and clawed as I handed him to the instructor, all while screeching and crying at levels that could be heard throughout the neighborhood. As he reached the steps and raised his head above the water, he’d turn to look at me with the kind of face and miserable eyes that would make even the burliest men shed a tear.
I wasn’t necessarily ready to throw in the towel (no pun intended), but man was it hard to watch my little love so upset! Lessons became an hour long interruption to our day; full of resistance, crying and sour moods.
I felt like we were being robbed of our summer. Where were all the smiley photos in the cute suits?!?
The instructor and close friends kept encouraging me to stick with it: “Everything will click one day.”
By this time, his fear of water extended beyond the 10 minutes of lessons every day. He didn’t want to go near any water. Which from a safety standpoint could be viewed as a positive – but remember, the best way to combat fear is with action. Letting that fear win would do no good in the long run.
So our action was to keep at it. We pushed past the tears during our own pool outings (including 45 minutes of straight screaming the first day of vacation) and continued with the daily lessons.
And then one day – that started like all the other days – we arrived at the pool without a tear. He REACHED for the instructor without a tear. He swam the entire ten minute lesson without a tear!
There were still tears that day – but they were mine.
The tears flowed as I watched my sweet, independent boy swim, smile and begin to accomplish the survival steps on his own.
I cried for two reasons:
1. I WAS SO HAPPY! Maybe we would be able to go about our days with less resistance and no more frustrated mom spirals.
2. My two year old had just taught me an incredible life lesson.
New things are hard.
Not everything comes naturally, even areas where we feel (and are told) we’re gifted require work.
New things are scary.
Whether it be facing a large tank of water as a two year old, or deciding to share your art with the world as a thirty one year old – new is full of what-ifs and worries.
But, new things get easier with time.
Little by little, by consistently showing up and always trying again, all those new things start to feel second nature.
I realized how ridiculously pathetic my version of “working towards a goal” was in comparison to what I had just laid out for my son.
My version of trying was:
- Getting an idea for a new hobby or venture.
- Researching and researching and researching.
- Trying one time.
- If not an immediate success, give up and move on to the next idea.
With swim, he showed up every single day. He worked and practiced and tried for just ten minutes each day. We created a routine – from getting ready and driving there, to waiting and listening to our hype music (thank you, JT) – he knew what to expect. Even on the days he didn’t want to do it, he knew what to expect and what was to come in the routine.
At 31 years old, my two year old gave me a swift kick to truly go after my goals and dreams. If I’m not willing to show up every day and push through the times that are hard, scary or awkward, I’m not allowed to complain about progress.
I think about how many times I’ve given up on myself in little things and big business ventures. When it didn’t come easily or right away, I assumed it wasn’t meant to be.
My little guy on the other hand kept at it.
I sat on the edge and cheered him on, watching his 90 degree angle backfloat progress into a straight, relaxed form. He went from resisting every roll to willingly turning to his back when it was time for a breath. His cries and tears turned to smiles and proud clapping.
My sweet, determined two year old encouraged me push through to accomplish the things that matter to me. Be it a hobby, business venture or relationship.
New things are hard. New things are scary. But, new things get easier over time.
Our little warriors are capable of so much. We are incredibly thankful for the survival skills and life lessons we all learned this summer.x≈
To the parent contemplating beginning ISR lessons:
I get it, you’re worried about the time and financial investment. It’s a commitment. Hear this, you can’t put a price on survival. ISR will completely change the way you and your children view the water. The program instills skills that teach your child how to instinctively respond. You are setting them up for continued success as they grow and get stronger. The foundation of these skills will grow with them. Take the first step and find an ISR instructor in your area!
To the parent flooded with tears because of ISR lessons:
I know it is so hard to see your child upset. It breaks your heart and makes you want to wrap them up in that towel to comfort until the tears subside. I wore sunglasses to every lesson to hide my sad eyes. Share your concerns with your instructor or a friend who has been through the program. I would guess most children and parents experience these same emotions! We tried a few things to help ease the fear early on – playing music before the lesson started, taking one of his toys to use in the pool, getting a new swimsuit in his favorite colors, etc. Ultimately, the best remedy was time and repetition. And know this, even if you child cries through every week of lessons, they are still learning the skills to know how to instinctively respond. Stay strong, momma! You’re doing the right thing!
To the parent whose child just graduated ISR lessons:
Congratulations! Follow the maintenance tips provided by your instructor to continue their success. Swim lessons are not a replacement for supervision, so get in and swim with your kiddos. There are so many memories to be made. And SHARE your experience! I would have never known about ISR if I hadn’t seen a friend post a video on social media. These survival skills are something to be passed along.
A painting with a story to tell.
In an effort to pass the blessing of our swim experience on to others, every Baby’s First Swimsuit Commission painting will provide one ISR lesson to a child who would not otherwise have the resources available. My painting endeavor began alongside our ISR lessons, so it brings my heart so much joy to give back in this way. Watching my little guy push through the hard times was the greatest encouragement to me to keep painting and pursuing this newfound hobby!
Baby’s First Swimsuit Commission slots open on August 1st, 2019.
